READING, UK. – April 1, 2010 – Symantec Corp. has today announced the purchase of two acres of land on the Earth’s moon as the build site for its new state-of-the-art ‘Data Centre of the Future’.
“Symantec has a long history of preventing data from disappearing into black holes. This move is the culmination of a vision to move Symantec from Cyberspace to real space” said Buzz Norton, a spokesperson from Symantec. “This project may be one small step for Symantec, but one giant leap for the next generation of data centres.”
The new facility will benefit from the latest green technologies for power and cooling, taking advantage of the moon’s lack of air and freezing temperatures to keep the data centre cool and utilising solar light to power the centre. “This data centre will be the greenest (or in moon parlance, the whitest) in the galaxy and will run without an earthly carbon footprint” said a sustainability expert too embarrassed to be named.
The lunar data centre will benefit from the next generation of security protection since it will be built out of reach of earth-bound elements and threats. It will communicate with earth via secure wireless transmissions. Buzz Norton concludes: “This level of security will totally ‘eclipse’ anything we’ve seen before.”
Forward-looking Statements: Any forward-looking indication of plans for products are clearly fictional and should be considered a joke. Any future release of the product or planned modifications to product capability, functionality, or feature are subject to ongoing evaluation by Symantec, and obviously will not be implemented in the foreseeable future, if ever, and should not be considered firm commitments by Symantec and should not be relied upon in making purchasing decisions.